Land of the Free? Or free-akishly ANNOYING.

So I have been promising ALL MY FANS a new blog (okay only one person reads my blog, yet I continue to pretend a have a large fan-base). And although my life is thoroughly exciting in all aspects of the word and I have endless topics I could write about, (false)  the most prominently annoying topic in my life, as of late, is Americans.

Now, I don't mean to be ignorant, because I do understand there are some great US-ians out there,(rare) but the country honestly believes it is "THE SHIZ". There have been a few things that have been pushing my buttons as of lately that apparently I need to rant about in order to get over.

Firstly, I have never feared more for my life than I do when trying to cross a cross-walk in the United States. I'm so glad that the people are encased in a huge metal vehicle are given the right of way. Yes, it makes a 100% sense to have the people driving the cars be able to plow around where ever they want! Plus, you know what really gets me? If I do happen to step out in front of a car, and Heaven Forbid, they have to wait a whole 15 seconds for me to SPEEDWALK (because I am that scared) across the crosswalk, I get the typical "Ameri-face" ----------------->
This is face that Americans love to give. Get in someones way at the grocery store? ----->This face. Say "bag(e)" instead of "ba(h)g"?-----> this guy right here. Say you like OBAMA? You best believe you're gettin yourself an Ameri-face.

The irony of the Ameri-face is that WE foreigners should be ones giving the face. To give you only a SAMPLE of the questions I have received about CANADA would astound you.

"OMG! Have you ever even BEEN to a Walmart before?!"

 

"Wait, you have Nation Anthem too??" 

"Well, it's probably weird for you to have Sunlight for most of the day right?"

"'Washroom?' Why would you need to do your wash?"

"Canadian Money? This is Monopoly Money."

All in all, American's have continued to prove to me that they are not worthy of sharing the continent with God's REAL country, Canada. Hhahah I'm completely joking. But as a friend once quoted to me, "We're bigger and we're on top. In prison, we'd be king." 

Mostly this was a rant that took me four days to write. Hopefully you see some of the humor.... otherwise I just look like an A-hole. Which doesn't really bother me either. 

XOXO